Explicitness

I call this as the age of being “explicit”. One is required to express one’s views/ opinions/ concerns/ voices/ differences/ emotions in a rather explicit manner. I am not here to offer a critique on this growing tendency observed in people (this tendency will keep growing in current times). However, I wish to only state what is happening regarding the nature of conversation between people:

1.       People are in a hurry to say things fast. And they are concerned that what they say should match with what they have meant. This tends to make the conversation ‘legal’ and it makes me feel as if each one is on guard and is trying to judge one another based on what you said. It feels as if “words” are the ultimatum in life and whatever can’t be expressed or said in words, is pretty much irrelevant and nonexistent. Personally, I hate this nature of conversation, because the “essence” of a personality can’t be captured in words. Secondly, the point of having a conversation is of having a “dialogue” and trying to discover each other and not trying to control or judge one another or trying to impose some kind of a change on another person (which is what the above kind of conversation makes me feel).

2.       If one tries to say everything in terms of whatever comes to one’s mind, (without analyzing or filtering or condensing), then it sounds more like trash and “noise”. One needs to step back once a while, take a pause, visualize what’s going on in one’s mind, think within oneself and then probably express those things. Chances are that by doing this, there will be greater clarity in thoughts.

3.       Thirdly, silence and pauses have an important place in our conversation. They tell a lot about a person – his/her intrinsic tendencies, fears, emotions, empathy, acceptance, resignation, surrender….all these attributes or dimensions of our personality NEED NOT be verbalized – they have to be FELT. And sometimes, a person understands another person more by silences and glances and hand shakes and hugs, than by countless accurately expressed words.

4.       Another tendency why people tend to talk so much nowadays is perhaps because of impatience and time shortage. Also because they don’t prefer to spend time to digest facts internally. TO be an introvert requires strength, to condense ideas to the bare essentials demands time. Tendency of talking too much without any valid thought, passing quick judgments, arguing, being pushy and demanding – all point towards a hyper mental state, anxiety, stress and related syndromes.

5.       My suggestion is: Relax for your own sake! The world is not going to collapse if one said a few words less, or was silent for some time or did not complete a task in a given time. One doesn’t appear a fool or a dumb person if one decides to keep quiet. And it should not be assumed that a person doesn’t have any opinion if he/she prefers to stay quiet. The irony of today’s times is that silence is misinterpreted precisely because we tend to over think and think too fast and pass quick judgments regarding silence. Silence is silence. One can feel Silence by remaining silent!

6.       Finally, it is my observation, that the more verbose a person becomes, the more excited he/she tends to be. The more silent a person becomes, the more meditative his/her responses become. If life is a prayer offered to the Almighty, then Silence becomes a vehicle to reach this state of mind.