Shree: dialog and feelings

 

240722: Shree: dialog and feelings

Every day is a new day and a new learning. It makes little sense to refer to yesterday’s actions. There is an aspect of value or God or long term view which is constant but requires interpreting and access everyday and every moment. All things that happen or change and which are perceived are by this constant value or by presence of consciousness, whose nature is unconditional bliss. I think “who”, “what”, “how”, where” and “when” is one and the same. Manifestation of any kind has a character of interdependence and change and hence it is alive. Humans are one way of manifesting or coming into motional existence but there are many other forms of manifestation. Hence everything can be said to be alive and interdependent – expressing the One medium that is perceived as many. Summarily it is all about motion and if I say you or me, then I am indicating the entire cosmos and not just one body or one mind or the self which I believe to be distinct (but which is not). I exist as something – as absolute (which is eternal and truth and complete and everlasting and blissful) or as motion (interdependent and changing) – but it is only One medium that I am. What I am need not be doubted at all since doubt itself is an aspect of motion but not the absolute. The whole effort is to generate those vibrations that help our mind to become silent and become less doubtful of motion and touch the base of God.  

Coming closer to home, one of the important learning today for me was about feelings. People take things by what vibrations inform them and not what I wish to say – that can end up in heated debates and each one not knowing with what intent the other is saying something (except for his own constructed). The basis of all emotions it seems is fear and that too is with improper knowledge of existence or of ego (as a phenomenon). Fear propels majority of our feelings and ideas and responses as long as we do not understand our own nature of existence and how vibrations generate. That being said, it is still not that easy to decode thoughts and portray the sequence, logic, intent behind what is being said and why – it is logical for us but may still not create a desired effect on the other person. Yes logic has its own advantages of decoding and separating the fear from peace and taking steps to respond to fear or irrational thoughts. But at the moment of dialog, it still does not become so simple since thoughts travel too fast to be responded, questioned and acted upon for their required impact. Before this happens the mental damage is already done!

Thus, it should be accepted that hyper responses, anxiety, anger would be generated despite we logically explaining how things ought to be done by all concerned and we may think intuitively why things still take a disastrous step and where did we go wrong?

I feel hurt even after logically trying to explain things to people and when I think why I got hurt then these are some of the self talk that I create within myself:

I take it personally that I was not able to explain it properly

I am not good enough to prove a point

I have an incomplete picture to suggest the right action

I cannot say things beyond certain point so I am hiding something or appearing confused and ambiguous

People think I am stupid not being able to understand them properly

I am guilty that I am not able to pacify emotions of people

Apart from the intent or the point I wish to discuss all above sub thoughts also create a reaction in me or a feeling in me - which is of a mixture of sadness, anger, doubt, guilt.  In this scenario it is better to take following steps

·         Take a deep breath and relax. Take a pause and let situation ease out. Emotions cannot be controlled and need not be and that is all ok. Emotions need to subside so people talk through intellect and not through emotions. Let time be given and do not expect how much time will be required to ease out things. Time changes everything so no one is going to stick to one annoying emotion. Things will pass but that attitude and faith should be ingrained within.

·         Do not take things personally and define your worth based on your mind or body or capacity or anybody else’s perceptions. All things are relative so what people say or perceive about you (in negative terms) is irrelevant and not applicable and the same is also about your own negative thoughts.

·         Do not justify, for everything has a valid reason to happen (including any emotions or what perceptions develop). What happens and what does not has nothing to do with myself since worth is beyond everything. Justification does not solve problems in absolute sense. People reach conclusions in their own way through different means and note necessarily in the manner I reach those conclusions. One matter may be simple to you but not to others and vice versa. Intellect is good as far as determining faculty is concerned but not for achieving control over other’s mind or for demeaning anybody. The best ability of intellect is to decide when to let go, take a pause and how to structure self thoughts and those of others in a way where peace gets maintained. Peace is above all and is the ultimate truth. At any cost, it should materialize within self and outside.

·         Focus on what you believe should be done and trust God for goodness.

·         Give time for peace, love, gratitude, forgiveness, silence every day. Give time to heal and become unconditional.

·         Silence and peace are more important than explanations or justifications or any discussions or disagreements. No one wins by debates. Silence only does win.

·         All things that happen are for good and by God. Trust Him.

Hari Om.