Shree

 Shree

There is a great amount of inhibition or reluctance of not talking or revealing anything (which I see it in people, friends, students, relatives and so on) – that indicates too much analysis and misinterpretation of other’s feelings or thoughts. This happens because one brackets you onto something and the judgment is done. There is, I feel, no use fighting this tendency and it has its roots far more deeper and subtle than what is felt on the surface. What we are forced not to reveal – is the fear of death or being rendered redundant or thrown away or being ridiculed or being abandoned or wasted. This fear is “inner” and not outer. To accept this fear, one has to go inward and see what is happening in that world. The mind can go in any direction, and if it chooses to; it can also dive inwards.

The fear of death cannot be made explicit – but it is best to “reveal” itself when least expected. I may talk or let anyone talk, but conditions need to support the revealing process, else it cannot be commanded to come out or even offer any explanation or expected to go away! Fear (or anything that is created) needs to be observed and expressed as it is. We make a huge mistake in curtailing unpleasant things, and making petty systems of complexities that curb or are wished to wipe out and tame us! How silly is that assumption! Mind is like a forest. We are in the forest. Something will definitely keep coming. Whatever comes, we have to ‘let it come’, so that it will pass through and go. If we do not do this, it will call on many others like itself till it can become some sort of a monster. If we argue with it, it will call on many others like itself so we will be overpowered! So you see, the flow of things in the forest should continue.

If I have to talk about my home conditions, there are so many things that can cause fear – communication, or lack of, methods of engagement, uncertainty of health, personality hiccups, aging complexities, forgetfulness, paralysis of action from the other, burden of taking care, burden of balance, burden to resolve, burden of letting go, minimal verbal support, being left to fend for myself and so on……I have no rational magical answer to any of this. I also know that things wont stop at all, no matter the effort. So  - is the answer in work or talk or discussion or faith or action or expression or what?!....Or letting things be as they are?!

That being said, the “approach” to this fear is also a process of engagement, acceptance, patience, faith, trust, love and so on. We may be bad at many things, the track of which I have lost completely! But the start and the end of the middle path of being in some sort of a pit, is surely becoming Divine.

 

Hari Om.